Top Chef

Things I learned from Top Chef last night:

• There's something called Quinoa (pronounced KEEN-wah) and it's a food.
  
• If your idea sounds terrible (stuffing mushrooms with dried blueberries), looks terrible, and tastes terrible, don't let people judge it, for they will piss all over you for it. This, of course, is in direct contrast to last season when Howie made crap and refused to serve it and was pissed all over for it. 
  
• Blinis are not pronounced like Bellinis. If you mispronounce these remarkable similar sounding names douchebags will wait in line to correct you.
  
• Blinis should be served while they are still frying in oil.
• Constant cursing can be fucking irritating.
• If you are serving food to a judge, you should probably taste it first lest you look like a hack.
• Don't buy meat from a farmer's market (they fuck you at the driverthru)
• Hippy Farmers that sell stuff at farmer's markets get pissy if you are in the slightest hurry.